Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Week Seven: Reading Diary B


It is really sad that the Ape King is behaving like he is. Many people are making complaints about him and he does not care. He does not even appreciate the fact that he has been given a lesser punishment He think he deserves everything. In The Great Saint, he finds out that his position of Stable Master is nothing special. It is not even a rank. His attitude towards this is crazy. He breaks his way out and returns to his mountain. He considers himself Heaven's equal. the Great Saint.

I never knew that someone could be so ungrateful and arrogant. Not even an ape.

Ape King

Monday, February 23, 2015

Week Seven: Reading Diary A

This week I have chosen to read The Monkey King Sun Wu Kung unit. I really like how the unit explained the Monkey King's life from his birth and so on. In week six, I noticed that many classmates chose to do their storytelling on Handsome King of Apes, which is why I chose this particular unit. This story reminds me of a quote that I have seen on numerous occasions but never really focused on its true meaning. The quote says something like "if an egg is cracked, then life has ended; but if the egg is cracked from within, then life has begun." I am not sure where this quote comes from besides social media. Another story that I really liked was Sun Wu Kung Gets His Name. I like to think of my name as my identity. I couldn't imagine  not having an identity. I think him getting his name was truly the beginning for him.

The young king

Week Six: Famous Last Words

Week six has been a pretty good week. I think I had a good story this week and received great feedback. Also, others had great writings too. As far as school is going, everything is pretty great. All my classes are going well and the semester is half way over. 

Spring break is coming and I cannot wait. I do not think I have a lot planned. I do know SXSW is that week. Friends and I have talked about going there. Also, I have a sorority conference that week too. I am sure that I will be busy Spring Break. I would like to relax and do absolutely nothing. That just is not possible. 

I have been applying for jobs after graduation, which is a job itself. Lol. Completing applications can become so time consuming. I am sure it will be worth it, when I receive a great opportunity. 
There is an upcoming event that I am super excited about. Oklahoma State University is hosting The Big 12 Conference. Students form all over the nation attend. There are many events over the weekend. I cannot wait to see some friends that live too far for weekend visits. There will be a greek stroll off! These are the best! They are similar to step shows but a little more relaxed. Also, there will be a party!

Speaking of step shows...There will be a step show in Norman on Friday, March 20th at The Embassy Suites Hotel at 11:00pm. I think everyone should go. It will be a great chance to learn about a different culture and black greek letter organizations. Also, who does not want to see a step show? No one. Lol. It is always fun to see students doing something that they love. Be there or be square.

All or Nothing

UnTextbook Online Reading Options


  1. Laptop
  2. I read the PDF in my browser, Safari.
  3. Heath seemed like a great option to read PDFs. I like how all of the controls are right there for you to see. On the other hand, I think Google would be best for this class because we use Blogger. I like everything in one place.
  4. I don't think any of the options were undesirable.
  5. I read a lot of books on my laptop. I use the Nook app by Barnes and Noble. I like it more compared to actually buying the physical book.
  6. I use the same technique for note taking. Sometimes, I use Microsoft Word or Google Docs.
  7. I use the same method for note taking.
  8. I do not like to print anything. I do not like to use paper, if I don't have to. If I do, I print on campus.
  9. No comments

Friday, February 20, 2015

Reading Diary Essay

I have really enjoyed this unit, Nigerian Folk Stories. This unit offered a variety of topics such as: tricksters and fools, women's roles, and children's stories. The stories were very entertaining and to the point, which I enjoy. 

There were a few stories that consisted of trickery and foolery. Of the Pretty Stranger Who Killed the King, was the first story of the unit. This was a great example that you should always treat others with respect because you never know how karma will come back to get you. A country really disliked their king that reigned over them. He was not friendly and boasted about his riches every chance that he had. A decietful witch dressed up as a pretty young woman, so that, she could attract the attention of the king. The relationship between the two progressed very quickly and they married. While the entire town slept one night, the pretty newlywed sliced her husband's head off! Crazy! Karma came back to retaliate against him in one of the worst ways. 

The women in this unit were the center of attention in a few stories. There are about six stories which women swept off their feet, helping someone less fortunate, or the person deceiving or being deceived. For example, The Disobedient Daught Who Married a Skull is the story that I chose for my week six storytelling. I was really able to be creative with this story and write a story that reminded me of a movie. It was not necessarily a particular movie; but I imagined a move as I wrote it.

The Woman, the Ape, and the Child was a heartbreaking story. A lustful man, Edem Effiong, tried to seduce the wife of Okun Archibong and mother to a newborn. A jealous man told a husband that his wife was romantically involved with an ape. The husband shot the ape, unsuccessful at killing him, so the ape tore the newborn baby to pieces. Next, the husband shot the wife out of anger! Love will make you do some crazy things.

The little baby could have grown to read some of the stories in this unit. Many stories answered questions that most children ask. Why are bats only awake at night? Why do hawks like to eat chickens? Why do cats eat rats? Why do we bury humans, when they die? Why does the moon disappear and come back? These stories answered questions in a rememberable way.

There are many stories that have the answers to these questions. I am twenty-two and still enjoyed these stories. Yes, I know the real reasons why these things happen but it is nice to have a cool story that goes along with it. 

Ape and Baby

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Week Six: Storytelling

A Parent's Nightmare

The night was late with a nice spring breeze. The stars illuminated Norman, Oklahoma, sometimes referred to as Nompton. It was the eve of May Graduation at the University of Oklahoma. Students, graduating and not graduating, crowded Asp Avenue with intentions to celebrate their accomplishments big and small. Destiny, a graduating fifth year senior, was one of the few that did not have such a jovial spirit as she laughed, drank, and danced with friends and strangers. It was as though she was just there so that she would not get fined.

Many students on campus admired Destiny's beauty, her poise, her intelligence, and her involvement in the community. She also considered herself to belong to the elite on campus. Her resume was very extensive. She believed that during her collegiate career that she remained faithful to her morals, values, and goals. She rarely dated because she had standards that could not be questioned. She was very selective with who she chose to associate herself with. The thought of being seen on social media in the wrong way frightened her.

Bang! A door slammed and hit Destiny.

"Hey! Watch out for the beautiful lady. You should still have some type of respect even if you are drinking!" said this tall Italian guy. His curly brunette hair blew in the breeze and his muscular arms flexed. He turned and smiled at Destiny with perfection. His teeth were white and straight.

It was love at first sight.

Destiny found herself consumed by admiration and unable to respond. Her friends began to laugh and sing, "Ooooh...Destiny has a crush." The two lovebirds locked eyes and time stood still. He held her in his muscular arms for her knees seemed weak. He took in her beauty.

Four weeks later...

As Destiny's father walked her down the narrow church aisle covered with roses, family and friends gazed in awe at her elegance. Her mother could not stop crying her eyes out. Her sobbing was somewhat distracting but no one could blame her. Her tears expressed the pain that she was feeling. Her little girl was marrying a random boy that she barely knew and moving overseas the next day.

"I do!", said the two newlyweds. They left the altar with bright smiles and focused on a happily ever after. The newly married Mr. and Mrs. Tinkleberry traveled hours to their new home, Chris Tinkleberry's hometown.

Unfortunately, their honeymoon did not last very long. Chris only wanted to marry Destiny to help grow his illegal businesses. The plan was for Destiny to lure rich druglords while Chris robbed them of their riches. Chris's sister, who was also part of the illegal festivities, felt sorry for the beautiful girl. The sister knew that her brother was up to no good and did not deserve such a wife. The sister knew that Destiny was raised in a different environment.

The sister started stashing money so she could send Destiny back home. Destiny once was a beautiful girl that had her whole life ahead of her. Unfortunately, one wrong decision ruined her life. After about two weeks, she sent Destiny back home by boat.

Once Destiny arrived home, she became a different person. She followed her parents' wishes and married a family friend. They lived happily ever after forever.

The Proposal at graduation


Author's Note: I chose to use The Disobedient Daughter that Married a Skull for this week's storytelling. Afiong had beauty that every other female in Calabar wanted and that made every man fall in love. Afiong was aware of her beauty and denied every man that asked for her hand in marriage. She wanted to marry the best-looking man on earth. She knew that she was not going to settle for just anyone because she deserved better. A skull borrowed body parts from other skulls so that he could look the best for Afiong. He got a new leg here. He got a new arm there. Her parents warned her about him. They knew that all that glitters is not gold. Soon enough they realized that there was nothing that they could say to their daughter. They finally let the two marry. The skull took Afiong back to the graveyard, which was not what Afiong imagined. She thought they would live in a luxurious home and have a luxurious future. The skull's mother wanted to send her back to her parents. His mother knew that he was up to no good. She disguised Afiong and really wanted to return her back to her parents. I decided to add a little drama to my story. I tried to make the story somewhat like what would happen in a movie. I changed the setting of the story and made it something that I could relate to. Many men did not ask to marry Destiny but wanted to date Destiny. Instead of a graveyard, I changed it to a bad neighborhood. Also, I changed the mother that sent Afiong home to a sister.

Bibliography: Folk Stories From Southern Nigeria by Elphinstone Dayrell (1910).

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Week Six: Reading Diary B


I feel sorry for the Ram, Lightening. No one should ever be so angry that there anger destroys the peacefulness of others. Especially, a child. The king did right to make them live far away in the sky. The poor mother needs a husband that can help raise her son to be a respectable man.

The chief was completely wrong for shooting them with a bow and arrow. I think the leader should have found a better way to put an end to the fighting. That was an amateur decision.

The Cock Who Caused a Fight Between Two Towns
Jealousy is such a cruel thing. It causes more issues than what seem to exist. The half-brothers should know to trust each other. Friends should never come between family members. I am glad that everything ended well. I am sad that many men died and the cock was killed.

The Affair of the Hippopotamus and the Tortoise
Poor king hippo. The tortoise cheated and that is not fair. I think a better way to go about the situation would be to genuinely get to know the king. The king was willing to feed the people in his own home. I don't think he was too worried about everyone knowing misname but more worried about them actually caring about him.

Why Dead People are Buried
This story is very interesting. It can be interpreted so many ways. Today, a dog is known as a man's best friend. I feel like it is because the dog is loyal; therefore, I am sure that the dog would have given the word correctly. I guess he did but the sheep beat him to the delivery.

Of the Fat Woman Who Melted Away
This story is too comical for me. Lol. Why would someone want to marry a woman that is made of oil. How do you have feelings for oil like that? Once again, one's jealousy ruined the happiness of someone else. At least, the husband did the right thing by returning the jealous wife to her parents.

Why the Moon Waxes and Wanes
This is another great story. I really enjoy this unit. This would be another story to tell children that ask a million questions. Lol. The poor woman was too greedy. She didn't care about the moon. She only cared about herself.

How the Tortoise Overcame the Elephant and the Hippopotamus
Another cunning character. The tortoise was too clever for the elephant and the hippopotamus. Why couldn't he just go to work like everyone else? Also, why would he want to be separated from his son. I realized that this unit highlights the selling or sacrificing of children.

The King and the 'Nsiat Bird
I have always wondered why some birds insist on invading town. For example, the birds at Sooner Fashion Mall are everywhere. I like the explanation for the birds being everywhere humans are.

Concerning the Hawk and the Owl
I agree with the hawk's friend about others that do not make much noise. I watch a lot of crime and drama shows such as: Castle, Lifetime, CSI:Miami, and Fatal Attraction. The person that is always guilty is the one that does not make a scene. I am very mindful of people that are very quiet in a room or try very hard not to be noticed.

The 'Nsasak Bird and the Odudu Bird
Why must we deceive our friends? I guess it is an "every man for himself" kind of world. I commend the Odudu bird for being honest. He is the true winner. Unfortunately, he starved to death and then his remains were eaten.

The Election of the King Bird
I like that Essiya did not feel the need to possess many slaves. As humans, we do not think that slavery exist for the animals too. The eagle is the definition of a true leader. A leader that is respectable doesn't have anything to prove.

African Fish Eagle




Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Week Six: Reading Diary A


This story was very entertaining. It was like a miniature movie. Sometimes, you have to be clever,if you want to retaliate against someone that is perceived to be stronger than you. This reminds me of the television show Catfish! It is not wise to just marry someone that you have not taken the time to get to know. I hope the rest of this unit is as good.

I have always wondered why bats are creatures of the night. Lol. Okay, maybe not always but it has crossed my mind. I enjoy creative stories like this that help get a point across. Besides the bush rat dying, this is a story that I could tell my future children. I am sure they will ask why bats like the night time.

Children. We have to learn things the hard way. We have to learn things on our own. Unfortunately, this leads to many other things that go wrong. I am glad this story had a good ending because it could have been terrible.

What goes around comes around. That is karma. I am shaking my head. Being jealous does not serve a purpose. It only brings ill harm right back to the sender. 

This story was somewhat glory. My heart cries for the baby. It is so sad that children  are brought into such violence, greed, and jealousy. The relationship between humans and apes has been ruined. A mother not only watcher her child die but also lost her life. No one won in this situation. When one person creates a lie, it involves so many other people.

That unfaithful friend ruined for all fish in the world. That is terrible. I have noticed that these stories revolve around an intimate relationship. Never betray your friends because nothing comes of it. Always lock you spouse in a closet until you return.

Talk is cheap. I like how the king made them settle it out the old fashion way. The worms were completely embarrassed. That sucks. I would really dislike to be defeated by everyone that lives in town also.

These stories are great! I love them. This is so great! This story provided an explanation for two animals. You should never be so greedy that you would "eat" your own eye.

The king gave the chicken a cruel punishment. You should never think it is okay to eat a child as revenge or repayment. That is not good. Why would the hawk want to eat a child? I guess animals do not care. Food is food.

The sun and the moon are nice enough to stay in the sky by themselves, so that, the water and its people have a place to visit. That is what you call a true friend. The sun has always been a good friend to the water. Once again, this unit has provided a story that has a great story line and meaning behind it.

After reading all the stories, I have realized that the results last forever. Cats still kill rats. I like how the king, like in the previous stories, is very involved in everyone's situations and problems. 

The Cat and Mouse


Friday, February 13, 2015

Essay: Ryder's Panchatantra

I really did enjoy this unit, Ryder's Panchatantra. It was very easy to read and understand. My favorite stories were The Sensible Enemy and The Foolish Friend. 

When I read stories for this course, I try to find the lesson in the story. I always try to relate it to reality in some shape or form, so that, I can better understand the true meaning of the story. I try to apply this practice to everything that I do in life. 

I feel like The Sensible Enemy and The Foolish Friend could both be used to understand each other. The sensible enemy became a friend to the three boys, after sacrificing himself first. I know that sounds crazy because he had negative and harmful intentions. The foolish friend obviously really cared for the king and it seems that the three boys really wanted someone who cared for them. 

I am not sure that I had a least favorite story from this unit. This unit was really good. I actually enjoyed reading the stories. I am not sure of any other background information that could have been provided. When I read stories, I do not necessarily look for any background informaton. I just read. 

For this course, I would appreciate units that are entertaining and do not feel like I am reading for class. This unit achieved that goal for me. Also, I liked the length of the stories in this unit. The lengths were short but not too short. I am a very "get to the point" person. I do not write with much detail. These stories provided a lot of detail but still got the point across. 

After reading this unit, I want to continue reading all the units from beginning to end. I know that I have struggled with working ahead in this course but this unit has spiked my interest in other units. 

Source: Panchatantra.org

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Week Five: Storytelling

The Innocent Murderer

Once upon a time, over the grassy hill and through the scary forest lived a bear. The bear was known to many others, who also considered the scary forest home, such as Grandma Mattie. She received the name Grandma Mattie from her closest friends because she was one of the oldest in the neighborhood of the forest known as Love Land. Grandma Mattie was born and raised in Love Land. It would be her home until it was time for her to fly with the angels. She loved everyone with the most unselfish heart, as if they were own children. The husband of Grandma Mattie had been deceased for years now. It was terrible how his life ended.  As soon as the two said "I do," he had a heart attack and fell over. The two love birds never had the chance to birth their own mini cubs. Her nurturing tendencies found a way to display themselves every single chance that she got. For example, she would routinely bake many delicious blueberry pies to share with her neighbors every Tuesday morning.

One day a young cub came into town with his head hanging low, his fur extremely dirty, and gooey snot dripping from his nose. Everyone looked down at him like a poor lost boy and with disgust. No one wanted to offer him food and shelter because of the ancient proverb:

"See a stranger, meet a stranger;
Meet a stranger, lose a life.
See a stranger, turn your head.
For you mother always said."

Everyone was too frightened to meet a stranger because one never knew the true intentions of stranger. They all have watched enough LifeTime movies to know that strangers are capable of pure craziness. Grandma Mattie did not mind meeting strangers. In reality, she loved meeting new people. She saw such opportunities as a chance to welcome more people into her loving home.

She quickly offered the cub, who said his name was Jacob, a slice of her famous blueberry pie and a bed to rest his body. They both took a liking to each other in seconds. She began to raise him, school him, and love him, like she would do for anyone else. Neighbors that disagreed with her friendliness towards the cub would voice their opinions about it. Unfortunately, Grandma Mattie chose not to listen.

One day, Grandma Mattie decided to teach the young cub how to fish. Unlike most bears, Grandma Mattie preferred to fish just like humans, with a fishing pole. After some practice, Jacob seemed to be a professional fisherman. One day, he fished for hours and hours because it was just so fun! He noticed that something was swimming in the water with a huge fin on its back. He wanted to show Grandma Mattie the massive fishy swimming so bad that he could hardly even speak.

He pushed Grandma Mattie in so that she could swim with the fishy. The fishy, with the huge fin on its back, began to rip Grandma Mattie to pieces. Her blood and limbs were flying everywhere and Jacob ran into town to get help. Once the neighbors realized what happened, they grieved for weeks. Poor Jacob was felt alone again. No one in Love Land wanted to take him in. They were all too scared of him now. The homeless little cub wandered off looking for another home. Until this day, Love Land has forbidden welcoming strangers into their neighborhood.
Source: Bear


Author’s Note: With this story, I wanted to create a story that was somewhat similar to the Three Little Bears. That story has been on my mind for days. The Foolish Friend was a great story, which can be found in the book of The Panchatantra of Vishnu Sharma, translated by Arthur W. Ryder (1925). I did not want to change it too drastically because I did like the original story line. I changed the animals in the story, how the two characters became friends, and how one character dies. The original story consisted of a king that became really close to a monkey.  No one understood why the king wanted to be great friends with a monkey. The king had everything he wanted under the sun, plus a monkey for a friend. During the king's afternoon nap, the monkey was assigned as a body guard. The king and his wife rested in peace until they were due for their next public appearance. The monkey tried to kill the mosquito that rested on the king. Unfortunately, he killed the king instead.I wanted my story to have a similar ending. Jacob, the little cub, did not understand that it was a shark in the water. He innocently sent Grandma Mattie to her ending.


Week 5: Reading Diary B: Panchatatra

Myth-Folklore Unit: Panchatatra

Right-Mind and Wrong-Mind
I really like the stories that have a story within the story. I think it makes it more believable. It's somewhat like watching a movie. It is unfortunate the Wrong-Mind was willing to involve his father in his wrong doing. 

The Mice that Ate Iron
Being greedy gets you nowhere in life. I believe in Karma. What goes around comes around. Laksham should have known that his lie about the mice would not work. I do like how Naduk secretly got Money-God to leave the house. That was very clever. In the end, it worked out best for both of them.

The Sensible Enemy
The enemy knew that no good would come from his evil thoughts. He would rather sacrifice himself for having bad intentions rather than have three young boys killed. At least, he came to his senses and did not remain evil spirited. 

The Foolish Friend
You have to be careful who you associate yourself with. It's best to hang out with others that have similar values such as: lifetime goals, manners, education, and etc. If not, you will find yourself in a situation like the King. 

How the Rabbit Fooled the Elephant
I appreciate that the king had compassion for the thirsty elephants. Most king have been known to only worry about themselves. There is a proverb for everything. The rabbits name was Victory and he achieved just that.  

The Cat's Judgement
I think the Crow should have spoken up for his friend, the partridge. I know he was sad and believed he would never come back, but I still wouldn't want someone to occupy my friends home. The rabbit should have just moved. He had not been there long enough to become upset about it. I think the cat is a great soul for not wanting to eat any of them. Unfortunately, I was wrong. The sneaky cat was not nice.

The Brahman's Goat
Do as you will. There are many speed bumps in life but you have to stick to your first plan. Many others will come and try to ruin what you have only because they want what you have. The three men were wise enough to fool the Brahman and get what they want. 

Mouse-Maid Made Mouse
This was a very interesting story. I really like this unit.

The Loyal Mongoose
At first, I thought it was crazy that she mothered a mongoose. I realized she took care of it like it was her own. I am a little slow sometimes. Lol. Mothers have to be everything in the household. That is why it's true that the woman wears the pants.

Thirst Elephants and Rabbits



Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Week Five: Reading Diary A

Mythlore-Folklore Unit: Ryder's Panchatantra

Introduction
I think that it is crazy for someone to make a promise like Vishnusharman. On the other hand, it is a good thing that Vishnusharman had enough faith in himself to make such a promise. Those that learn from a master that is passionate about what they are teaching will prosper.

Numskull and the Rabbit
This story is a prime example of how people can get so big headed. The poor Numskull was too full of himself that he didn't have any mercy on the other animals.

The Ungrateful Man
The Ungrateful man was a man of judgement. He judged each character and did not seem to look at himself with such judgement. I do like this story because it proves that when you do things out of the kindness of your heart, everything will work out in your favor. Even if harms finds you, you will be okay.

The Plover Who Fought the Ocean
I'm not really sure how I feel about this story. I am somewhat confused on it's purpose and/or point. Hopefully, the next story will help me better understand.

Forethought, Ready-Wit, and Fatalist
I see that the wife tells stories that need another story for the previous story to make sense. I like that she has so much wisdom to share with her husband. The husband is a good character and keeps the story alive.

The Duel Between Elephant and Sparrow
It's crazy how people can come together to help someone. "Like a good neighbor..." I love that commercial. It's also crazy how one person's misfortune can cause so much for everyone else.

The Shrewed Old Gander
I know many times that I did not listen to what my mother said. I'm not sure why I didn't listen. I do know that she was always right and I had to find that out the hard way. Unfortunately, that only makes one back track with things. Always listen to the wise. They have most likely been through it.

The Lion and the Ram
The lion is the king of the jungle! He is almighty. Overall, other animals know that but the lion can sometimes think differently.

The Beauty of Elephants


Monday, February 9, 2015

Week Four: Famous Last Words

This past week has been crazy. I have been so busy. On a good note, there is an opportunity that has come available. It is a conference that takes places for three to four days, which allows college students to be mentored by companies and learn. Unfortunately, it takes place during May Intersession so I will not be able to participate. I passed the opportunity to a friend, so that, someone can enjoy it. I hope she has fun. Lol. I am going to facetime her everyday, so that, I can feel like I am there. 

I started working out with a trainer. I would really like to get back in shape and run in a marathon. The "Freshman 30" is real. I did not believe but I do now. It will not go away no matter what I do. I am so sore. I have been walking around like an old lady. Crippled. 

On another note, I am planning a step show. I would like for everyone to come and bring friends. It will be on Friday March 20th at the Embassy Suites Hotel and Conference Center. The show starts at 11pm. I am so excited about this. I love event planning. It is so fun to see things start as an idea on paper and blossom into so much more. 

Spring Break is coming!! My friends and I are going to SXSW! I have never been able to go because I have always had something else to do. Freshman year, my mother would not let me go anywhere for spring break, because she said it was too dangerous. I just left my sophomore year. I went to Panama City Beach and I had a blast. I did not do anything crazy. Lol. My friends actually call me a grandma. I guess because I am so conservative.

                 Source: My photos

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Reading Diary A: Persian Tales

I appreciated the mother goat in this story. I think it is amazing the amount of effort that mothers put into protecting their children. As for the wolf, what goes around comes around. He deceived the baby goats and he had to pay the price.

In the story, the little girl had a story to tell her aunt. She found a small coin in her pocket, which lead to other events in her day. This is a reminder that the smallest things that we take for granted can have the biggest meaning.

It seems that this story was a train of reactions. We may not realize how much influence we have on other people. Our attitude or feelings towards something can be the determining factor for some else's attitude and/or feelings. This story was an eye opener.

I cannot believe that a father not only betrayed his son, but he actually cut the son's head off. I think that is just crazy. You just do not know who to trust these days.

It is really unfortunate that the husband did not listen to his wife. It is also unfortunate that people will go out of there way to deceive people. The husband knew that there was no point in trying to run from the wolf. I don't like that this story didn't end in a positive light.

I do like how this story ended well for Nim Tanak. Also, he took it upon himself to make things right. It is always good for people to take matters into their own hands, which is also known as being self motivated.

Even when we think that we are not capable of doing something, there is still a way. It may not be the way that someone wants you to go about it, but it is what works for you. 

When you have faith in what it is that you are doing, then everything will work out. We, as humans, stress ourselves by worrying but we have no control over what happens. 

Persian Tales